The Seat Of My Pants - * Recently Matt got his toilet replaced. But they...

* Recently Matt got his toilet replaced. But they failed to replace the old seat, which is too small for the newer, stronger model.

* And though he appreciates being able to safely and easily flush a bag of softballs and grapefruits, he’d rather not have his throne share Michael Phelps’ underbite.

Jan 28 2011

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About me

Matt is an experienced road warrior who has spanned every nook and cranny of the American landscape since graduating from the finest of the Big XII universities, back when it had 12 schools.

He currently lives in Milwaukee, following mobile marketing tours with Fuze Beverage, Range Life Entertainment, the U.S. Air Force, a certain giant hot dog-shaped Chevrolet, and others.

His latest marketing gig, for an unnamed gigantic mega-corporation client, has him flying to destinations all over this great land. He has also taken to living vicariously through himself, using the alter ego "Uncle Mitch."

By reading this paragraph, you have formally challenged Matt to an eating contest. And he accepts. Name the time, place, and dish.

If you have any questions, comments, death threats or intriguing domestic job leads, please feel free to email him at YourOldBoyUncleMitch@gmail.com

U-S-A!